broken to pieces..

sebelum aku menceritakan apa yg brokennye.. aku nak bagitahu yang hari ni aku telah sedar sesuatu yg aku rasa cam nak bagitahu kat semua orang...



....rupa2nye harga bedak muka a.k.a foundation aku tuh... adalah lebih mahal daripada tipon aku.. huhu..betapa murahnye la tipon buruk aku tuh.. dah le burok..lampu pun dah kiok... ada sesiapa ke nak sponser tipon baru kat aku...or korang ada tipon burok korang yg lebih cantik dari tipon aku sekarang.. boleh kot nak sedekah kat aku...huhu...



ok lah..tu kisah my foundation and my half broken phone..



ni kisah broken friendship, broken hearts, broken loyalty and broken trust.

the friendship started when we all came back from abroad [Jan 2007] and live in a house together. however some of us has some backdated history of bad times and good times. but the friendship went on beautifully on surface level.. so very innocent of me to think it was pure from the heart..

it started a few months back.. it was between A and B... i thought it was just a misunderstanding gone really bad. deep in my heart..i hope they would just patch it up and be friends again. but it didnt happen. so i state my stand that A and B are still my friends separately. but if i were forced to pick a side i would have to choose A. recently, C [another one of us] blog about B in discreet and code telling how B had treated her badly and betrayed her. FYI: C is my super bestfriend. she is my shopping/study/everything else in between buddy. way back then [in Jan/Feb 2007], C had told some of us that she had some bad history with B loooong ago and she wouldnt want to trust her fully and having some problem being friends with B. i fully understood. because as human, we all had made some bad decisions in our lives. and we could have forgive but it was never forgotten. which i really think it was fair enough. but nonetheless, C and B got along pretty OK in my eyes. until C said because A and B are no longer friends, C has decided there is no more reason to be friends with B. and its fine with me. i got along with B just fine too.. despite the warning i had from somebody else asking me to take care of myself when i am around B and never to tell B any secret whatsoever. and i have heard rumours about B. but being me, i couldnt be bothered about what people say. i once have been a victim when people say things that are not even true.

but recently, through sms, phonecalls, blog and a catch up session with D [another one of us too], i have found out what B has really done to C. the incident happen a few years back [before Jan 2007], but C just found our what B had done to her just recently [10 days ago]. before i really know what happen, i was thinking to just stay connected to B. but now i think, not only what B have done to C is bad because C is my super bestfriend. even if B could have done it to any other girl, i would think she is lower than life itself.

come to think of it, more than a few times i felt looked down by B because i never shop like her. all her clothes are either ZARA, TOPSHOP, or MNG or yang setaraf dengannye... all her bags are Guess or what knot... To me, my family aren't rich.. i couldnt afford any of that. So case closed. i wasn't even to keep any grudge about it. but i think B knows deep in her heart that she is lower than life herself...so she took pride in buying high end goods just to think she is higher to the rest of us who are larger than life who appreciate friendships among us girls more than life itself.

i felt so betrayed by what B have done. how could anyone do such thing to a person who she called a friend. i really felt cheated by her poker face. i didnt mean to be 'mengungkit' with what i have done for her. all her tears that i wiped. all her stories i heard. all those times and money i spend for her and with her. i felt gross to even think i have been friends with her. it hurts me.really bad.

i have choose to end all communication with B and end the so called friendship between her and me.

if B happen to read this, these are my last words to u. i couldnt even have the heart anymore to send u a text. even C still have a heart to send u a text. but not me.

B, you have broken my trust and heart with what u have done. U have destroyed my friendship, the most beautiful thing i could ever give to any girl. i no longer think and feel u deserve such beautiful thing. i love my girls as much as i love myself. B, u are no longer considered my girls.