Saturday, May 30, 2009

mummies to be...

here is something for u to look forward...


=)



oh cant wait!

Friday, May 29, 2009

hidden

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?--> Yaqin

You Are Wild and Outrageous

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.People see you as a complete enigma, and only you truly understand who you are.

You spend most of your time introspecting and seeking truth.You're a very interesting person... but not many people know you enough to realize it.You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time.


Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.You also have a very active imagination.

You often get carried away with your thoughts.You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.



and most of it is quite true...hahaha

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Drama minggu ini.

school life.

final day of the pksr 2. yipee for the kids and grunting with the teachers. i have never ever seen a pile this high to be marked!!! OMG! im drowned. discourage by the look of it. haiihhhhhh

BTW, this is what u said God's will. i was not supposed to have a slot with my class today. but i think i would rather be with them for 90mins than being with students i dont even know. so i asked to exchange with a teacher who is supposed to be baby sitting them. they are sitting for Seni paper. God knows how i cant draw. but i can colour pretty nicely. (*_*) so i joined the fun. gambar winnie the pooh jah pun...=P anyway, while i was colouring. drama drama. 2 girls came up to see me.

Najwa: Miss YaQin Nureen jumpa ni kat atas meja Auni Afiqah..
...miss yaqin yang irritated sbb budak2 ni kacau dia tgh syok mengaler pun amik la kertas tuh. potong stim betul la budak2 nih..
Miss Yaqin: ok. nanti Miss Yaqin tanya ngan Auni. Pergi duduk and wat kerja.

... on the paper was written 'kertas ni Auni Afiqah. Nureen kalau awak tak nak kawan saya, saya tumbuk mata awak... saya bunuh awak masuk neraka kubur...'

Miss Yaqin yang masih irritated pun panggil Auni...' Auni Afiqah... mari sini kejap...'

Miss Yaqin: showing the paper... and asking nicely...Auni ke yang tulis nih? kenapa Auni tulis cam ni?
Auni: bukan saya tulis... Bisyrul yang tulis.

drama drama

Miss Yaqin: kenapa Bisyrul tulis macam nih?
Auni geleng kepala. in my heart, at a glance i know it was not Auni's handwritting. i put on alot of weight on nice handwritting so i know who have problem with their handwritting. walaupun cikgu dia nyer tulisan lawa sket jek dari cakar ayam...

immediately i get up to check on Bisyrul. i compare some significant letters. i was obvious it was written by him. but being kids of course he denied. so i just warned him and the rest not to do such things ever again. i leave it at that. and the paper was gone no where to be found.


little did i know that Nureen has history of being bullied, and she is the only child and suffering some heart failure. So the mother took it such a big deal.

The mother called one of the teacher. Kak Jun inform me about Nureen's condition. but i refuse to do anything as the kids are already gone back home.

Today, the first 2 period was English. when i came in. i saw a few empty seats. one of it belongs to Nureen. I was just about to talk to the students about it when the mother came. we had to talk in front of the students. the mother said Nureen had bad dreams last nite about it. she even said that the person who wrote such things have inner problems and wanted to meet the students parents and all.

i couldnt make Bisyrul to confess. i dont know what else to do. then their former class teacher who is teaching them Maths came for her lesson. i dont know what she did or how she did it. But Bisyrul confess saying that he wrote it. because Nureen and Batrisyia always calling him names.

so there u go drama minggu ini. tomorrow. i hope final episod. either the mother malu because her child is doing such thing. or couldnt accept it.

but the thing is. apada budak2 nih... bikin teacher malu saja.. budak pandai tapi buat perangai bukan2...haihhhhh

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

hurt

Bottled up inside
are words i never said
the feelings that i hide
the lines you never read.

You can see it in my eyes
read it on my face
traped in side are lies
of the past i can't replace.

With memories that linger
won't seem to go away
why can't i be happier
today’s a brand new day.

Yesterdays are over
even though the hurting is not
nothing lasts forever
i must cherish what i've got.

Don't take my love for granted
for soon it will be gone
all you ever wanted
of the love you thought you'd won.

The hurt i'm feeling now
won't disappear over night
but someway, somehow
everything will turn out alright….




....in this poem i find solace in mending my hurting heart. in the past, present and hopefully not future.

Monday, May 18, 2009

broken to pieces..

sebelum aku menceritakan apa yg brokennye.. aku nak bagitahu yang hari ni aku telah sedar sesuatu yg aku rasa cam nak bagitahu kat semua orang...



....rupa2nye harga bedak muka a.k.a foundation aku tuh... adalah lebih mahal daripada tipon aku.. huhu..betapa murahnye la tipon buruk aku tuh.. dah le burok..lampu pun dah kiok... ada sesiapa ke nak sponser tipon baru kat aku...or korang ada tipon burok korang yg lebih cantik dari tipon aku sekarang.. boleh kot nak sedekah kat aku...huhu...



ok lah..tu kisah my foundation and my half broken phone..



ni kisah broken friendship, broken hearts, broken loyalty and broken trust.

the friendship started when we all came back from abroad [Jan 2007] and live in a house together. however some of us has some backdated history of bad times and good times. but the friendship went on beautifully on surface level.. so very innocent of me to think it was pure from the heart..

it started a few months back.. it was between A and B... i thought it was just a misunderstanding gone really bad. deep in my heart..i hope they would just patch it up and be friends again. but it didnt happen. so i state my stand that A and B are still my friends separately. but if i were forced to pick a side i would have to choose A. recently, C [another one of us] blog about B in discreet and code telling how B had treated her badly and betrayed her. FYI: C is my super bestfriend. she is my shopping/study/everything else in between buddy. way back then [in Jan/Feb 2007], C had told some of us that she had some bad history with B loooong ago and she wouldnt want to trust her fully and having some problem being friends with B. i fully understood. because as human, we all had made some bad decisions in our lives. and we could have forgive but it was never forgotten. which i really think it was fair enough. but nonetheless, C and B got along pretty OK in my eyes. until C said because A and B are no longer friends, C has decided there is no more reason to be friends with B. and its fine with me. i got along with B just fine too.. despite the warning i had from somebody else asking me to take care of myself when i am around B and never to tell B any secret whatsoever. and i have heard rumours about B. but being me, i couldnt be bothered about what people say. i once have been a victim when people say things that are not even true.

but recently, through sms, phonecalls, blog and a catch up session with D [another one of us too], i have found out what B has really done to C. the incident happen a few years back [before Jan 2007], but C just found our what B had done to her just recently [10 days ago]. before i really know what happen, i was thinking to just stay connected to B. but now i think, not only what B have done to C is bad because C is my super bestfriend. even if B could have done it to any other girl, i would think she is lower than life itself.

come to think of it, more than a few times i felt looked down by B because i never shop like her. all her clothes are either ZARA, TOPSHOP, or MNG or yang setaraf dengannye... all her bags are Guess or what knot... To me, my family aren't rich.. i couldnt afford any of that. So case closed. i wasn't even to keep any grudge about it. but i think B knows deep in her heart that she is lower than life herself...so she took pride in buying high end goods just to think she is higher to the rest of us who are larger than life who appreciate friendships among us girls more than life itself.

i felt so betrayed by what B have done. how could anyone do such thing to a person who she called a friend. i really felt cheated by her poker face. i didnt mean to be 'mengungkit' with what i have done for her. all her tears that i wiped. all her stories i heard. all those times and money i spend for her and with her. i felt gross to even think i have been friends with her. it hurts me.really bad.

i have choose to end all communication with B and end the so called friendship between her and me.

if B happen to read this, these are my last words to u. i couldnt even have the heart anymore to send u a text. even C still have a heart to send u a text. but not me.

B, you have broken my trust and heart with what u have done. U have destroyed my friendship, the most beautiful thing i could ever give to any girl. i no longer think and feel u deserve such beautiful thing. i love my girls as much as i love myself. B, u are no longer considered my girls.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

-old skul-

im kindda old skul. well not to say im old now.. huhu hate the fact that the second digit of my age is bigger than the first one..=( but i kinda like... old ways.. old stuff.. and by that i mean traditional..



yeah rite. there are certain things i like the old way. for example my wedding..i know i know.. u are asking which part.. but i must tell u really most of it is not my decision. but i was prep up before the big day the super old way! i had to eat sireh! 5 bloody sireh.. couldnt look into the mirror 3 days which resulting of me not brushing my hair and i think i look like a lion... couldnt go out of the house for 3 days.. cannot lalu bawah ampaian kain for 3 days.. which is good so i cannot jemur kain or angkat kain! yahuuu.... had to mandi bunga 3 times a day for 3 days... cannot talk to soon to be hubby [that time laa...] for 3 days.. which is ok actually because we are pretty busy wit the wedding. so we just text like 3 times a day..hahaha... yeah yeah at that time i complain.. but i was pretty happy to be treated that way..i didnt know it was like that. its a different experience. so glad to be given the chance.



ridiculous u may think.. not to look into the mirror for 3 days! come to think of it.. im a bride to be that time.. of course im obses with the condition of my skin.. but because i cant look into the mirror. i dont know what is going on.. and im not obsessing about it.. and to mandi bunga 3 times a day for 3 days.. my hair didnt even get to dry! but i am super wangi u know!!! SUPER! i smell like flowers for a week! ohh hubby must love my smell that time.. =P



but tht was then... for future reference...



i have been secretly wishing...years ago.. someday, when the time comes for me to have a baby...after the delivery, i want to be taken care of the old skul way... like our grandma and mothers...that kind of way.. i believe there are many medical benefit and reasons for all the little things. i want to learn to take care of myself. loving myself.. rasanya la kan... ada lagi tak orang yg bleh jaga aku dgn rigid nyer mengikut tradisi lama... my mom u said? haha...dia tuh moden.. silap ari bulan dia cakap aku yg ketinggalan zaman...huhuhu.. camne tuh.. tak dapet den nak nolong nyer..huhu...

~ni blog seminggu lepas....so dah takde feel nak sambung...kita cerita bab lain je la ekk..

Monday, May 11, 2009

what do you know...

well, im sure some of u know about the online version of CLEO mag. i know its a bit childish for me to be still reading cleo..but its the only mag i can pretty much use most of the info and relate to.. i mean its nice to see all the expensive stuff in other mags. by expensive i mean few thousands bucks for a bag or shoe. but why bother when u cant afford it. so lets stick to our range..

i have been spending some times at the askcleo.com.my reading all sorts of things and questions. its gud to know that u arent the only one dealing with extra large pores, super oily skin and blackheads. i had my fair share. and i have tried a number of products.. im in constant search of products that suits me really well and i wont change it ever again. and its nice to know that i can give my 2cents worth to those who are searching for things to try while dealing with those skin problems. you see, i dont like going to the counter and ask. because all they want to do is to sell their product. so i fall back to magazines to somewhat gives a neutral point of view. sometimes i peak into what my friends are using.. but most of my friends are rather lucky to have good behaving skin.. so no luck for me there.

and i have been droping tips on the relationship sections.. wow... im NO expert in this kind of thing. yes im married. but you see... that guy im married to is the only guy i have been in a relationship.. other than him, was just friends. i mean real friends. so i dont really have alot of experience in this section but yet i can tell alot..

now i understand why people say Sharing is caring. because when u share u know a lot more.. it shows that u care about the other people u are sharing with but its actually you yourself being caring to yourself.

then again, as my girls always say, when it comes to FOOD.... sharing is NEVER caring. haih we and our food... =P

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

strength

im worried sick right now. today, mom is going through her 4th cycle of chemo. she was diagnose with breast cancer late last year. she had the surgery to remove it on the second day of school this year. that is the reason why i am here in Kuantan instead of KL.

it got worse after the 3rd cycle. its like she is losing her strength. her willpower. after the first n second cycle it took her just 2/3 days to feel better. but after the 3rd, she was going on and on.. about a week. i guess she is tired. i dont know what else to do.

she is the strongest woman i ever know. when we are leaving for abroad, all mothers cried saying goodbye to their son/daughter..she didnt even show any sadness. i take it she is so proud of me being the first of her children to be studying abroad. and she believe in me to be able to take care of myself. it made me believe i can take care of myself. i will b okay because she believe it.. why wouldnt i b okay... she is the reason why and how i am now.

its 9.30pm now. she is not back yet. usually she will b back by 4/5pm. please pray for her and for me. i hope she is okay..

where are my sunshine...

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

catch up

it was a long weekend. 3 days. which means i get to be 'wife' longer than usual. (*_*)

i found out on last wednesday, i just got another niece! yippeeee... get to kiss and hug a newborn!! can't wait...=) i love newborn.. they are just adorable..like dolls.

on thursday, i hurried back from skul.. my bus is at 4pm. but the driver seems to be super slow.. i arrived later than usual. so i went straight to KLCC to meet up with hubby. Later we had dinner with tasha and Julie and Julie's friend .. haih... Julie is usually the ontime person.. Tasha is a bit more flexible with the time.. but what i dont understand is.. how could Julie terinfluence wit tasha's time management??? (",).... u see, i dont really mind waiting for them.. because i have hubby next to me. so it gives us time to catch up.. but the kedai makan wont wait!! =P we didnt manage to go california pizza 'chicken' [as julie puts it... hahaha] so we had dinner at dome's. it was good really. the company made it all better.. =) nice to c u girls!! catch u again soon darlings!

woke up super late on Friday... hubby went to office to pick up stuff. I stayed home watch TV. nice isnt it? hehehe... when he return.. i start cooking. for the first time.. i siang ikan! laugh all u want.. but it was my first time. the ikan a bit hancur...but still recognisable. huhu... so the menu: nasi putih, Ikan masak tauchu, and pucuk midin goreng. Pucuk midin is sayur kampung.. hubby loves it soooo much and claim that it can only b found in Sarawak.. i think it is called by different name here in semananjung.. but i love it too. my ikan tauchu was a bit sour due to terlebih air asam.. but yet he eats it like its bloody delicious. that is my hubby! everything easy care.. =) after lunch he went for friday prayers. that afternoon, we took a nap infront of the telly. till about 4pm went to the zoo! hehe.. helping to prepare the place for the family day tmrw. before we went home later that evening, we took a ride in the car around the zoo! haha bila lagi nak pusing zoo naik kereta.. that night.. we had dinner n watch the telly.


the next morning, we woke up early and get ready to go to the zoo again!! and today, we took pictures of our car parked in the zoo. hehe.. bila lagi.. i even get to record the ride! cam safari plakkk... hehehe.. actually, its his dept family day.. =) and i get to meet his friends.. and put faces to the names.. yada yada yada.. treasure hunts and all... so we eat and be merry. around 2pm, we go back and get ready to go to Sepang..visit the latest addition to the family... a new tiny weenie baby girl.. so kecik..like thumbelina... hubby takut nak pegang newborn.. so i dont have to berebut with him.. =D later that nite, we go back to gombak.. i was asleep the whole way.. too tired..

sunday, already??? time flies... well when we are having such good time... it flew like wind passes by.. =( we had omelette for breakfast.. and kemas2 and all. read the sunday paper together.. then watch telly..till about 2pm baru nak mandi... haihhh juz like when we were still in UK. weekend jek...mesti mandi lambat...=) anyway, it was already lunch time. we spotted a domino's coupon in the paper.. so we decided to use it. so we went to domino's for lunch. again... easy care! then, it was already time for me to get ready to go home... my bus is at 6pm. had to bid goodbye to hubby and wait another 4 days to get to see him again..

that was my short long weekend. =(